Friday, September 12, 2008

Redman Adoption Kiev Day 4-7 Donetsk/Kiev



Well we arrived in Donetsk and the adventure truly began. First of all we were told that it was too late for us to see Emma and that when we do get to see her we need to be accompanied by the local supervisor and a Ukrainian official ( former KGB agent ) that will question Emma. This was new news to Vitali, who is our guide and connection with the orphanage. He said this is a new rule for this region that he just found out about. We were disappointed, but tired from our trip, so seeing Emma the next day was fine with us.

The next morning we fulfill another new requirement by making a second copy of the entire dossier. So I am writing this as I sit waiting for the copies. This is a very interesting place & culture. When we leave here we have to wait for the call from the supervisor who will tell us when it is convenient for her to introduce us to Emma .

Our next challenge today is to find another apartment. The one we are in does not have internet or a bed! It is expensive for what it is. He have Vitali staying in another apartment so we have some privacy, but his place is awful. It looks like an abandoned apartment in the Viet Nam era. … Cockroaches, cigarette buts, and filth everywhere. We have to get him out of there.




Okay, so we meet with Emma at 4 pm at the orphanage. The orphanage is nice. It looks like a decent boarding school. The Director takes us to an empty classroom. We are a little nervous about how this is going to go. We brought a big box of cookies for Emma to share with her classmates. But there is nothing casual about this meeting and what do you say to an 11 year old about yourself or our family that might be appealing to her. There is no chance to get to know her. It’s quite awkward for us as well as her.

Emma walks in the school room with a look of utter disdain on her face. She is tall and beautiful, but very unhappy about what is going on. The assistant director is there as well as the inspector, Vitali, and Paula and I. We are all seated around her…(can’t imagine that she feels very relaxed about this) and she will not even look at us. Everyone that speaks Ukraine is talking to her and she will have nothing to do with whatever they are saying. She keeps looking at her hands and playing with her fingers which are covered with black ink. I try to make a few jokes, which only get a rise from Vitali and Paula.

Apparently, Emma is not interested in being adopted. She has a grandmother and younger sister nearby and she thinks that her parents will get it together to come and get her out of the orphanage. In the meanwhile, she is happy where she is. We are disappointed, but as the Assistant Director said “Life goes on.”






And, so back to the apartment to pack up, get a flight for the following day back to Kiev, and try to set up another appointment with the SDA (State Department of Adoption). Oh, well, it could have been worse….what if we spent 10 days with her and then she finally said something. Better that we know right up front.

But, wouldn’t it be nice if the orphanages all had skype and we could have done that interview without the expense and time involved with travel?

This is a picture you will NEVER see again - Paula in McDonalds!!!




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